A New Blog

We have been home from China for 5 days now, and I find that I miss journaling on our Baby Jellybeans site. I could keep it up there but in it's way it is sort of un-handy, so I am going to try blogging. I am hoping it is as cathartic as the BJB was. I certainly enjoy reading those of some of my adoptive friends.

Cara is sleeping, an early nap as it happens. Usually, we try to keep to her foster mother's schedule and eat lunch around 11 and put her down for a nap in the neighborhood around 12. Today though, she ate a huge snack and when we laid down on my bed to watch a bit of tv, she played with me and snuggled and then suddenly she was still, with her head on my tummy. I looked down and she was softly snoring away. It occured to me what a lot I've learned since coming home 20 months ago with Jarrett. That would've thrown me into a tailspin when I was such a new mommy. "Oh my Lord...I have to get him UP! He can't sleep NOW! We MUST stick to the schedule!" Jarrett has been a precious gift to me in countless ways, a gift to everyone who knows him...but he has taught me so much and one of his greatest lessons has been to lighten up; most things just don't matter that much. So she sleeps now, she'll eat a little later than usual and maybe we won't get ALL our errands done before we pick brother up from school...big deal. She's so precious and so still. I cannot bear to wake her, and what would be the point of that anyway?

Another contrast...my bed's unmade, my house is still cluttered with the things you buy for a trip to China, bring home unused and don't know where they belong because they didn't live in your house before you bought them for a trip to China and didn't end up using them, or using them all...and so it goes. But, the difference is this clutter is not pushing me toward the edge of the cliff...I have plenty of time to clean up later, a whole lifetime to find homes for umpteen little tiny packages of Kleenex. For now, I think I will lay back down and spoon my sleeping beauty.